Anyway, I met this guy a month after I started attending the UU church. That's why i get a creeepy feeling every time i go there, but i still attend certain groups when i'm assured i will be supported.
Initially, this guy was a lot of fun, but his behavior became more and more obessissive. He constantly went to the minister for advice. One of her reasons for not letting me join the church was that "i was causing too much drama." One of the boundaries she set was that i'm supposed to keep my personal drama out of church. Like i have any control over a stalker.
After i broke up with him the first time he set up a meeting with the minister to "work things out." at this meeting she did suggest some boundaries which worked well at first but he went right back to his old ways. I feel stupid for attending the meeting. I should've told them both to go straight to Hades and not pass go. After we just agreed to be friends, this guy even got an engagement ring. I kind of freaked about it and told my support group leader who gave me this lecture about being hypersexual and advised me to just tell him to "back off." This is the same moron who continued to invite him to certain activities without asking me and she wonders why i don't return her calls. She sent me a card out of concern.
So anyway after we broke up the second time this guy continued sending me hate mail and opened up new accounts to avoid being blocked. He also harassed people in my family, barged in on one of my counsolers, and probably bugged the minister who of course probably blames me.
Now everything is quiet except that he plans to use the church to engage me. So i quit the Caring Commitee. I have followed the advice of people on this board and have gone somewhere else. deserve better than that. I like some of the people there though and will continue to nurture those friendships.
So, did anyone else meet in church? I think telling the story helps my pstd. Thanks to this jerk and all his supporters: the support group leader and the minister.
The good thing is i'm slowly getting my life back. I'm making plans to move on. I have lots to look forward to.
I'll be patient and hopefully meet a decent guy out there. I know there are many.