Stalked by a Stranger who is well respected by the police

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Chazzy

Posts: 2069

Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2004 2:52 am

Post Sat Jan 29, 2005 6:13 pm

Trust me, he would know. They know somehow when you react even when you are not reacting directly to them. When you call the police or you call an attorney or you call anyone, it's like a psychic connection which is there on both sides which is why even after we leave the dance floor they continue to dance alone. Because in a way, or at least in their minds, they are still dancing with us.

I was speaking in a general sense in terms of ignoring and meant to emphasize the need for us to move on with our own lives. Look at the amount of time we all spend trying to "prove" they are stalking us to a legal system that quite frankly doesn't care whether they are or not.

The legal system does not see anything but the dance. Unless, or until, the stalker physically does something, it does not consider us a victim. That is one of the harsh realities I have had to finally accept and one which hopefully will change as more and more victims become more vocal about it.

Even when they go away finally, they never really do. Hard to explain except to say like you say they become like a ghost that from time to time makes an appearance.

Tell yourself you don't believe in ghosts.
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Mdougherty

Posts: 19

Joined: Fri Jan 14, 2005 10:38 pm

Post Sat Jan 29, 2005 8:43 pm

dvh
Since your stalker seems to be so tech savy, is it possible that you could speak with a PI or some techno geek from one of these "spy" equiptment stores to find out if there is such a thing as any kind of bug detector? Maybe I have just watched too many of those CSI type shows, but I do believe that there has to be something out there that can detect any hidden bugs which may exhist in your home. How unnerving to know that he is listening. But if, just if, there is something which can detect any device he is using to spy on you, it is also possible that he may have left some physical evidence behind in the area where he planted the bug. Good Luck and stay safe.
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Southern Girl

Posts: 284

Joined: Sun Apr 25, 2004 2:56 pm

Location: Survivors: A Garden of Glass Flowers

Post Sun Jan 30, 2005 7:58 am

Trust me, he would know. They know somehow when you react even when you are not reacting directly to them. When you call the police or you call an attorney or you call anyone, it's like a psychic connection which is there on both sides which is why even after we leave the dance floor they continue to dance alone. Because in a way, or at least in their minds, they are still dancing with us.


I am astounded to find that this is true for someone else...to get validation on this. I swear that there really is some cosmic undercurrent to it all, and they really do know that they are being thought of. It's like stirring some cosmic pot of trouble each time his name passes my lips.
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crazylady

Posts: 8

Joined: Mon Dec 13, 2004 1:26 am

Post Sun Jan 30, 2005 9:15 am

HI dvh and welcome.

My stalker/s also listen to my conversations/phone calls. I find myself doing/saying things to test it. Both for video and audio. Crazy isn't it?
It still sometimes seems surreal to me. Like a bad movie.

Mdougherty brought up a good point regarding counter spy equipment. I have gone to a sight www.tscm.com. It has alot of information about counter spy measures. The site is quite extensive. They give you some info on bugging equipment, such as the telephone itself can be used to bug the room, even when not in use. Have you ever had the phone ring and got a strange beep? This can be some kind of bug that allows the telephone to be used as a microphone. They can hear anything said in the room. The sight explains things much better than I do. They talk about the equipment that can detect the different types of bugs.

One thing they also tell you is to think about what you will do IF they find something. It seems that even when something is found, there is not the reaction you would expect from the authorities. It is difficult to prove who planted the bug. It may just become another painful experience and the stalker will merely put the bug back when the flurry dies down. Just something to think about.
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Tomgirl

Posts: 11

Joined: Thu Jan 20, 2005 12:15 am

Post Sun Jan 30, 2005 3:32 pm

Re: I never entered the dance floor--.

dvh wrote:In fourteen years I have seen the guy twice both times on business. The last time I talked to him was in 1993.

I would love for him to go away but how would he know if I was ignoring him?

I never talk about him or the stalking in my home or on the phone.
Very few of my friends even know about him.

Because his is "like a ghost" and never does anything illegal, like breaking in or stealing, the police haven't talked to him on my behalf since 1992.

Hello fellow Oregon Ghost hunter-I liked my stalker better when I thought he was a ghost.
Well I hope soon that he is no more than a ghost, or at least just a bad memory, and if anything happens in your house you'll at least be able to determine that it's paranormal and not just abnormal. Stay safe.
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dvh

Posts: 14

Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2005 4:47 pm

Location: Portland, Oregon

Post Sun Jan 30, 2005 3:59 pm

I just don't want him to kill me......

I have good reason to believe that my stalker has killed other women and have strong reasons to believe that when he chose me from my business ad photo, it was because I was "a type" and an intended victim.

I feel that the only reason I am still alive is because he hasn't found away to kill me without becoming a suspect. His early attempts failed. I can give the details, if anyone is interested.

I feel if I ever drop my guard he will kill me.

Valentine's day is coming up. Chances are excellent that another women in my area is going to go missing. Her car will be found with her purse on the seat and the keys in the ignition. She will most likely be a blue eyed blonde and may have been upset about something when she left home (bugs?), causing the police to believe she just took off.

If this does happen ( I hope it doesn't), I feel an obligation for the sake of the woman's family to call the police and give his name. Nothing ever happens when I do this but I still feel I need to make the call.

All of the women I believe to be his victims vanished the week of Valentine's day, except one.
She vanished on August 4th, 1994. This was the same day my stalker called to congradulate me on my new home. This was the first and only time he has ever called me, that was a distorted, blocked call.

This young woman vanished from her job on August 4th. She worked a few blocks from my new home. He car was found with purse and keys. Her body was never found.
That night I woke to the sound of a glass cutter on my bedroom window.

The difficult thing for the police to understand is that this man does not want to "date" me. This man is a loner who doesn't date.
He is an attractive, neatly dressed man who could date if he wished to.

When he came, to my office, for his counsiling apointment in 1992, when he got to single/married question of the information form, he announced proudly that he hadn't been in a relationship in over 10 years.

He then turned in the paper work and left, explaining he had no issues to work on. That night I woke up when I heard my bedroom window shaking. I called out (thinking it was the retarded man next door) and then heard someone walk away.

Only one body of a victim I suspect to be his was ever found. Her truck ran out of gas. He body was left near the truck, purse on seat, keys in ignition. She had over 30 stab wounds. She had not been raped.

This guy is dangerous. I have no choice but to call the police when I know he is in my home and I am there alone.

I will dance if my only other option is death.
dvh
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dvh

Posts: 14

Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2005 4:47 pm

Location: Portland, Oregon

Post Sun Jan 30, 2005 4:05 pm

was distorted in previous message should read wasn't

The call to congradulate me on my new home was the only time I got a "real" phone call from him.

He left a message with my answering service for me to call "D" and the phone number of the lunch room where he worked. When I asked for D, he said this is Don.
dvh
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catspaw

Posts: 104

Joined: Sun Jan 09, 2005 9:11 am

Location: Missouri

Post Mon Jan 31, 2005 8:31 am

DVH,

I saw my stalker in the autumn.
Last edited by catspaw on Tue Feb 01, 2005 6:59 am, edited 1 time in total.
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dvh

Posts: 14

Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2005 4:47 pm

Location: Portland, Oregon

Post Mon Jan 31, 2005 9:20 am

Catspaw

Is you stalker a stranger?

The police in my area have the misconception that a stalker has to be someone you dated or worked with. Not that knowing a person makes them any less dangerous. Did you know that murder is the leading cause of death in pregnant women in this country?

But stranger on stranger crimes need to be taken seriously as well.

I was watching a show on the Green River Killer(some of his victim's bodies were left near my home). For 20 years the police "thought" that Gary Ridgeway was the Green River Killer and questioned him many times but had no evidence against him.

His co-workers called him Green River behind his back. He recently confessed to 48 murders in a plea bargain to avoid the death penalty but admits there were more than 48. It was the one who got away that helped convict him.

Gary Ridgeway did poorly in school and isn't nearly as bright as my stalker, plus they had the bodies. With my stalker only one body was found, all the other just went missing. But Gary was still able to avoid arrest for a very long time.

The one thing that stuck in my my mind was when Gary Ridgeway said he wanted badly to kill his 2nd wife but couldn't because he tried chocking her once and she told her family. He said he knew after that that he couldn't stage an accident, because he would be a suspect.

Of course he blamed her for his killing spree because "she messed things up, by telling on him when he choked her, it so he couldn't kill her", so he had to take his anger out on other women. I am not buying it. I hope his ex-wife didn't either.

We must remember that the fear of getting caught is the only human emotion a psychopath feels and keep that fear alive until they are caught.
dvh
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Chazzy

Posts: 2069

Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2004 2:52 am

Post Mon Jan 31, 2005 10:48 am

The police in my area have the misconception that a stalker has to be someone you dated or worked with


This is a misconception that is to be found all across the country and even in the case of celebrity stalkings there is this "question" in terms of whether there is "something else going on" besides stalking.

In one case, the stalker claimed the victim was her lesbian lover and so there was this "question" about the victim until the stalker barricaded herself in the victim's home with automatic weapons.

In another case the victim met the stalker who was a friend of a friend to discuss a script. The next thing she knew he was at her gate proclaiming his love for her. There was this "question" since they had a "business relationship" as I understood it.

I have experienced two "relationship" stalkings and one "anonymous" stalking which on the surface looks like anything but. In reality, however, I only met this man twice. The second time to try to find out why he had been stalking me for six months which looking back was the last thing I should have done but at the time it was the only thing I could have done. An attorney and the police both had said for over two months there was nothing they could do. Because of who he was, someone suggested I meet with him. I actually had to force the meeting. He didn't admit it but he didn't deny it. He literally screamed "I need help" that day.

I think it is human nature to respond to someone. Particularly if you know they need help. Even moreso if you have a relationship with them.

The problem is that sometimes when we do, we turn the music on and the dance begins. How do we know when to respond and when not to? We don't. But we do have that chill up our spine. That gift of fear.

The "anonymous" stalkers are usually the most dangerous and particularly when they involve a celebrity victim. The obssession is so complex and so distorted that the "rejection" apparently is the trigger that results in an act of violence. But that same dynamic can be found as has been pointed out here in all anonymous stalkings.

I recall reading something about serial killers having stalked their victims prior to killing them. If so, you have to wonder how many victims reported the suspicious activity to law enforcement and they dismissed it for the very reason you point to. That there is this prevalent attitude in law enforcement that strangers don't stalk strangers.

It is very frightening to realize you are being stalked by someone who may be a serial killer and law enforcement seems unable, or unwilling, to intervene and it seems impossible that they would not be able or willing to intervene and yet most of us have experienced it ourselves and know all too well how law enforcement dismisses us and our fear. They dismiss our fear more than anything else.

I often wonder how a police officer or a prosecutor really feels when someone they dismissed ends up being killed and, more importantly, if it changes their attitude towards stalking.

The statistics would indicate the attitudes are changed very little. It is still too easy to dismiss a victim and blame them for being a victim in our society. Law enforcement officers and prosecutors are always very quick to respond with the "they should have"s and someone really needs to hold a mirror up to them when do. There are often quite a few "they should have"s that can be directed at them as well.
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dvh

Posts: 14

Joined: Mon Jan 24, 2005 4:47 pm

Location: Portland, Oregon

Post Mon Jan 31, 2005 12:39 pm

stranger on stranger

Well said, I can tell you are talking from experience.

After a lot of thinking, I did turn my stalker in as a possible suspect in the Brooke Willberger case.

It's not the same "MO". She wasn't taken in her car, nor was it on Valentine's day. But my stalker lives very near the place she vanished from last May and she looks so much like one of the women (I reported him for) that vanished in 1993, that the TV stations were all making comparisons between the two cases.

I doubt if he if will even be questioned, since he has no previous convictions, but you never now.
dvh
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